Opinions expressed in this blog are representational of my own thoughts and not those of the Peace Corps or the Government of the United States
Hello everyone back in the U.S. I hope life is well and good. Things are great and I am enjoying life as always here in Africa. I just finished my mid service training and it is wild to think that I have less than 12 months of my service left. Five other volunteers and myself are getting ready to take a 2 week trip to Mozambique which should be amazing. I leave on the 8th of May and I am in the capital now preparing for the trip. The plan is to go to the southern coast and do the beach life on the Indian Ocean. Speaking of water, word among the American community here has been circulating about the huge oil spill back in the States. It has been a bit sad to read and hear about the amount of pollution occurring and the long term environmental and economic ramifications. Hopefully some kind of damage control can be done to help the situation. As for this post, I wanted to take some time to talk about the women of Malawi and their roles and responsibilities in their day to day lives here. Keep in mind what I’m about to say is not the same for every woman and man in Malawi, but you can certainly make some generalizations. There are good situations here too, but I can also say that what you are about to read is an honest portrayal of what life is like for many women plain and simple.
Women in Malawi are in charge of many if not all of the daily chores around the house, in the village, and in the fields. They do lean a bit on their children to help, primarily girls and young women, but they ultimately bear the brunt of most duties. Families are typically large here in Malawi with most women having an average of 5-7 children and a few families having more or less (yes more). So remember when I write about certain chores like cooking and drawing water for drinking and bathing, we are talking about a huge undertaking because of the large family size. Also consider that many women are caring for additional children, usually their orphaned nieces and nephews. Most women here wake up at the crack of dawn anywhere between three to five o’clock A.M. First thing they do is sweep the inside of their homes, outside of the home (which has some large environmental impacts as I’ve mentioned) and then they sweep the outdoor kitchen. Other daily chores include getting water for the family, cooking, getting the wood needed for cooking, cleaning the inside and outside of the home, hand washing the families clothes, working in the fields, getting the children ready for school and many other jobs. Chores like drawing water can be quite a long process as well as strenuous work. Women carry all this water on their head of course and most buckets fall in between 20-40 liters. They start doing this at such a young age that they develop super strong neck and back muscles but this tendency to carry everything on their heads from such an early age leads to many neck and back problems throughout life. Similar situations occur when women go and collect firewood. Most cannot afford to buy illegal charcoal so they are responsible for going out into the African bush to cut trees which can be extremely far and then carry them back to the village. This can be very dangerous for women for the following reasons: poisonous snakes are prevalent, injuries due to the heavy load and distance back to the village, and rape which is very common, because of the isolated and distant areas they have to travel in order to find firewood. It is also common for women to be raped while working alone in their fields.
Women do all the cooking and cleaning for the whole family. Some women are smart and cook in the open air but many use kitchens with small windows and little to no ventilation. They either use wood or charcoal (the latter being illegal in Malawi but available everywhere). Cooking like this meal after meal and day after day makes respiratory illnesses extremely common and in the top five leading causes of death for women in the developing world. All laundry is washed by hand here, which is not only extremely difficult, but requires a lot of water. In my area at certain times of the year we have seasonal rivers which the women can utilize to wash clothes and dishes and save themselves time and energy. It should be noted that while performing all chores, including chopping firewood, most women have babies strapped to their backs, which is how babies are almost always carried here.
Rape and domestic violence are unfortunately very rampant here in Malawi just like in the States. The only difference is that women here have little recourse to take legal action or get community support of any kind. Physical abuse and rape is technically illegal by law in Malawi but culturally it is very acceptable. There is a huge gender inequality in this country and many men believe that the woman’s role is to serve the man. Most men believe that it is a women’s duty to have sex with her husband whenever he wants and sadly many women believe they don’t have the right to say no or the courage to challenge the status quo. Few women have any say in such things as birth control (even when they know their husbands to be unfaithful) or family planning or birth spacing. Sex for women is also very unpleasant. Many men and women both believe that the dryer the vagina the better and men try to ejaculate as quickly as possible which they believe is the manly thing to do. Women get little pleasure from sex and most women do not understand that a normal thing like masturbation is OK and can be enjoyable for their own pleasure
Women do attend school but most fathers view educating males as a much higher priority. By secondary school the percentage of women who drop out is astronomical. The major problem is that once women start to menstruate they often get married and start having children at a young age which means school ends. Little value is seen in an educated woman as opposed to a woman who can help in the house, fields, and etc. Also it is not that uncommon to hear of adult male teachers sleeping with students and similar horror stories.
For me and many male and female volunteers we struggle at times with the treatment and thoughts about women in this culture. On many days I argue in a friendly thought provoking way about the perception of women in this culture and their roles. I challenge them all the time and tell many of my male friends that they are lazy and have no idea how to take care of a woman. I tell them they would not be considered a man in my culture for forcing and asking women to do extremely physical chores. I am one of the few men who actually goes to the bore hole and draws water and the women in my village it love it and respect me a lot for it. I always try and encourage the girls at school and around my village to go to school and to make sure they finish. The government is trying to do certain programs to encourage gender equality but it takes a long time to change culture but I hope with time and education things will go in the right direction for the women of Malawi many of whom are amazing people who never get the chance to reach their full potential due to cultural practices.
I have two women in my village who are a big part of my life. The first being my neighbor Lucy whom I spend lots of time with. Men and women usually are not friends in this culture but we are breaking the norm which is good for people to see. We chat about everything and I eat lunch and dinner with her family every day. They are my family here and I enjoy sharing my life here with her and her husband and their two children. She takes good care of me and we help each other all the time. Her husband is my friend but has a bad drinking problem so he disappears most days to drink whatever he can find. He works for the government but spends all the money for the family on alcohol. Lucy runs a preschool from her house and uses the money she makes to support the family, and often has to hide her money from him. She teaches preschool kids just like we would in the states, teaching things like the alphabet, counting, songs, and she teaches mostly in Chichewa but also basic English to the kids. All her students come to me and greet me in English which is funny. She dropped out of the equivalent of 12th grade because her father died and her uncle’s would not pay for her to continue school. However, she is very smart and an independent thinker which is not something you find everyday here. She talks about going back to finish and I always encourage her and offer to pay for her schooling. She never stops moving from dusk till dawn. She does all the aforementioned chores and also conducts school from 7:30 AM until 11:30 every day dealing with 20 young children. She is truly an amazing woman who I want to try and help as much as possible while I am here. I recently got her trained by a friend on how to use female condoms so she can teach other women in the community. We both give out male and female condoms at our homes and with her help, we are getting lots more people using protection (some people are intimated to come to me because I am a male and white). I could say more but you are getting my point about the respect I have for her.
My other great relationship is with a young girl named Kamboyua. First off she is deaf. Some in the village have developed a basic system of sign language with her but she has never had much of an education of any kind. I know a few of the signs but not many. She helps my neighbor at her preschool and also helps me around my home with small chores. I tend to over pay her but her family is not all that kind to her so she uses my money to buy soap and necessities. Also if she gets sick at times I will pay for her to get medicine and go to a health clinic. She comes over and hangs out with me. We obviously communicate little but she likes to look at my magazines and books, pictures on my wall, and other oddities which a westerner has at their home. She really wants children and to be married but a deaf woman is viewed and treated negatively by society here. They think of her disability as being a heritable genetic disorder, which it’s not. She was impregnated by some man before I got here who would not take responsibility for the baby, which she later miscarried. She is a wonderful person full of laughs and smiles and I enjoy our relationship of silence.
There is hope for a better future for women in Malawi. In the city where education is more prevalent and western influence is apparent you can see a big difference in the role of women and how they are treated. Malawi just needs those ideas to spread to the poorer rural areas but the ultimate key is education and specifically women being educated and becoming financially independent.
Lastly on a personal note about a month ago I climbed to the peak of a place called Mount Mulanje here in Malawi. It is the tallest mountain here in country and beautiful. I went with another volunteer and his girlfriend who was visiting from the states. They are both amazing people and we spent three days hiking and staying in cabins along the mountain with our guide. The conversations were amazing it was one of my best experiences in the country. Funny thing though she asked my friend and I a lot about our lives here and she commented on how much she enjoyed hanging out with such hard core feminist. Africa changes you in ways you never expected and although I have always been respectful of women my eyes have been opened significantly here about the struggles women in other parts of the world face.
Cheers to you all and I miss and love everybody
Opinions expressed in this blog are representational of my own thoughts and not those of the Peace Corps or the Government of the United States
Pictures
1-Me with my neighbor Lucy and her children Maggie and Hop
2-Women in my village carrying babies on their backs as usual
3-My deaf friend carrying water
4-Me at my bore whole drawing water
5-Young girls carrying firewood
6-A picture on Mount Mulanje
